Forgiveness

I find myself today in a place where I need to forgive some things. One is fairly small, and really, I should not have been holding on to it. The other is quite large, and I am coming to realize that it has impacted a LOT of different areas of my life. So I thought I would take a look at forgiveness.



That wonderful source of great knowledge (insert sarcasm font here), Wikipedia, says:


Forgiveness is typically defined as the process of concluding resentment, indignation or anger as a result of a perceived offense, difference or mistake, and/or ceasing to demand punishment or restitution.


Even WebMD chimes in on forgiveness:


Letting go of grudges and bitterness makes way for compassion, kindness and peace. Forgiveness can lead to:


 Healthier relationships


 Greater spiritual and psychological well-being


 Less stress and hostility


 Lower blood pressure


 Fewer symptoms of depression, anxiety and chronic pain


 Lower risk of alcohol and substance abuse


Whatever. . . .


We all know where we should look to learn about forgiveness: The Holy Bible, the written Word of God. In the NIV version, some form of the word “forgive” is used 116 times. That seems like a lot to me, so I would guess it’s important to Him. And isn’t our entire FAITH based on forgiveness? Don’t we ACCEPT that FROM Him when we come to Christ? Because we are so sinful, only He can cleanse us and make us worthy of sharing in His riches. And this is something that is FREELY GIVEN, by the Lord of the universe, ours for the taking, if we only accept it? And since HE gives this so freely, SHOULDN’T WE?


AH, there it is. . . there’s the rub. How can we TAKE something so precious, so easily and so often, and then not give it BACK to others just as easily?


Sometimes we think it’s complicated. People hurt people. That’s just part of who we are. We live in a fallen world, filled with sinful people, ruled by the dark one. And it’s easy for us to feel this “justified anger” at the people who have wronged us. And for some people, that “wrong” is WAY wrong. I’m thinking of things like sexual abuse of children, physical abuse, murder. The “big” ones. But other times, we are hurt by people in other ways that are quite hurtful and it’s hard to let that go.

But I don’t think the Bible asks us to forgive “just the small stuff.” That would be easy. I can forgive the guy who cut me off in traffic because maybe he was in a hurry to pick up his kid from school. Yeah, OK. I can do that. And I can forgive my husband who sometimes hurts my feelings with something he says when I know that he really didn’t mean it the way I took it.


But what about the hurts that run deep? The ones that maybe come from your childhood? From someone you love so very much and you just really, really want them to love you back? I would guess we all have something like this in our past. And I am trying very hard to deal with mine right now. And it hurts. A lot. Rejection always does, doesn’t it?


But I have decided that I can’t keep letting this hurt from the past color my NOW. And I surely don’t want to let it damage my FUTURE.


So I am working on forgiveness. Not because he has asked for it. Not because he even wants it. And honestly, not even because I really want to GIVE it.


But because He asked me to. And because He has forgiven me. And it would be selfish for me to keep it all to myself. . . .

So I am laying it ALL at the foot of HIS cross, asking Him to help me. . . to forgive, just as He has forgiven me, totally and completely and without strings attached, once and for all. I can’t do this on my own, Lord. You have to help me do it. Please, Lord, help me do it. . .